“I took the last challenge (I felt that listening was the crux of it) and it made a difference. My teenage kid was having a sulky belligerent “nothing is right” night. Pushing all of our buttons and ended up on her own in the living room (nobody wanted to be near her). Then – I remembered the challenge to listen without solving, I and went to sit with her and let her know I would love to help if I knew what was wrong and I was there for her if she wanted to share. It took her a few minutes – then she burst out in a rant – someone was moving in on her best friend, another girl was being mean to her and there was nothing to do. My normal response would have been to “tell” her what I thought she could do in her relationships – and to find her “something” to do. This time it was – “yikes – that’s a lot of stuff to deal with, relationships are hard, no wonder you are feeling a bit stressed”. Sure enough she stopped sulking and elaborated a little , and before I knew it she was her normal happy self – singing and entertaining me in her normal way. The exchange took a deliberate effort and about 5 minutes of my time – but through it – the tension in the house turned to good humour. What an eye opener this was for me.
Now – to curious questions – wish me luck!” – D. Vancouver
“It has been eye-opening for me how little curiosity I have when it comes to my kids (and husband) and their experiences. Entering a conversation where the focus is just on them is really hard. THANK YOU for the parenting challenge! I am realizing I need to make some changes and find your posts incredibly eye-opening and useful.” – K. California
For more about the Parent Challenge, experiences and the tools parents are using visit us here.