How many of you have chosen not to do or say something, even though in your bones you wanted to? You may have questioned it, felt strongly about it or trusted there was another way of doing it and chose to stay silent out of fear or the concern that conflict might arise if you were to speak up.
So many of us are afraid to do or say things that we believe in, question, or disagree with, based on fear of how the resulting conversation might go or the consequences that could arise from it: loss of job, loss of friendship or relationship, fear of looking like a failure, learning something new about someone that you didn’t want to know, fear of not having all the answers, fear of not being/ having/ feeling enough… the list goes on and on.
As we take the listening skills we have covered over the last few weeks and look at choices 3 and 4 that include curiosity and asking questions, we wanted to share with you this TED by Margaret Heffernan: Dare to disagree.
We agree with Margaret that if we want to have thinking organizations and a thinking society, then we need to start teaching communication skills to children and adults, at every stage of their development. The communications skills that Margaret expresses as being so important, we define as those of a Coaching CultureTM.
Over the next few weeks we will explore the importance of curiosity, asking questions, testing assumptions, how to shift from blame/ criticism into learning and collaboration, and step by step on how to have these “brilliant” challenging conversation as Margaret describes in her TED where the outcome is collaboration and innovation led by the curiosity of possibilities and not the fear of conflict.
Let’s collaborate, together. We invite you to work with us and challenge us, as we want to work with you and challenge you. Let’s dare to disagree and as Margaret Heffernan says, be “thinking partners and not echo chambers”.